Autumn

Looks like autumn is here. In the morning it is so freaking cold that I am tempted to take my winter jacket. 4°C are fine with that but later in the afternoon the weather becomes milder and it is not that bad...but those mornings! So what about snow - when?

Liar Liar

My GP doctor died on Saturday (aged 54) - sad thing as it is but this whole thing is beyond unbelievable. Having spent almost 20 years with a tyrant husband brought her life to an early end, supported by a rapid progress of the breast cancer. Yesterday, we had to listen to lines of utter LIES that were streaming out from the mouth of the lady reading the funeral oration he has written. One rubbish after another. None of us mourners had enough strenght to demonstrate our scorn for HIM. Stealthy looks of patients and neutral glances of others did not betray any feelings but WE ALL KNOW about you!
She does not have to suffer anymore. Awfull to say this - I am glad she is gone. I truly hope she finds peace in her soul because she really deserves it. Rest in peace!

While Waiting

...for the unevitable to come, I approached to the point when I can also occupy my mind with creative ideas. Having a partner brought me a new venture - cooking (oh, what a surprise!). Or I might also name it a cooking experiment. I am not a cook, actually I am quite clumsy and cannot cook almost anything of Czech cuisine but thanks to internet, invention is lurking on me from the bottom shelf of my brain.

The first test was steak tartare achieved in my own hand - or a piece of beef in symphony with my new blender. As it came unplanned, I forgot to acquire old loaf of bread necessary to make fried bread but who would care. Wholecorn bread slices also did the thing and garlic was applied in slices. Red wine, suitable with beef meat, was also not somehow available (see the notion of "unplanned"). OK...some flies in the ointment, but the result was more then satisfactory.
Beefroot is said to be healthy and I happen to love it so what else we can do with it but the beetroot stew with thyme and butter I cooked several times already? Beetroot spread! So this recipe of mine (internet-inspired) became my second first. Actually second second because the real second first did not turn out due to unpredictable incompatibility of ingredients. Combination 2 beetroots, onion, gervais (do not use ricotta) and salt/pepper conjures a marvelous taste! Simple recipe: grind the cooked beetroot, add chopped onion plust the rest. Yummy!
The third first is only half-way through. Marinated pork ribs are still in the fridge enjoying a spa-therapy of honey, garlic, lime sauce, lime shavings, chilli, oil and pepper. What comes out of this is one huge question mark. I will know tomorrow when I am going to grill it (in the kitchen oven though). If it turns out well, I'll be in gourmet heaven as it smells so good. And one thing I know for sure - if it is edible, we will sleep with our backs turned on each other as our breaths will be so garlicy, that none of us would be able to endure it. The recipe said - add 5 cloves of garlic...
And last but not least - my firstcooking-oriented blog contribution this is!

Holiday...ing

I have been away from all the problems for a week. Physicall distance that is hard to cross slightly easies all the hardship I am going through at the moment. Problems mutliply, unfortunately. I have no choice but to accept as it comes - there is nothing you can do about people who are dying. I wish I had the power. Patiently waiting for what comes next, I buried myself into world of grief to make myself ready. Is it at all possible to get ready? Lets wait and see...I will be able to tell you soon.

A Letter to Sleeping Grandmother

Dear Granma,

When I talk to you, you are deep asleep and you don´t hear me. I want to tell you so many things but you don´t listen. You can´t. My words are tammed by the hospital room and my tears are swallowed by my cleavage when they are dripping from my chin. Holding your hand is not enough, for me. I want you to complain of anything! I want you to gossip on hospital personnel and hear your observations. But then I just cream your tense complexion with your favourite almond cream, also your hands need a bit of it, they are dry. The scar on your head is healing well but it needs a bit of some softening too. From time to time you wiggle your shoulder or foot and I eagerly wait for more movements to show me that you feel my touch. My 10-minute allotment is soon over but I am allowed to stay longer because we all believe our words and soft toouch will be good for you. Leaving the place, I wash my hands but the moment I need to blow my nose in the lift, I smell your cream - the cream you´ve been using for 50 years. The smell I will recognize anytime anywhere. I wash my hands at home, and again and again but the cream smell still persists on my fingers telling me that you are still here with us - sleeping.

I need you to be home for my birthday lunch next weekend. Sunday, around 11:30 ...this is your lunch time. You are always hungry by this time. I make sure we cook something of your favourites. Soup will be served too, of course!

I guess you had enough of sleep so please - come home back to us. We are waiting for you. Grandpa quit smoking, so awesome he is. We miss you so much.

Kisses,

Your loving granddaughter

Story of a 2nd Grandfather

How shall I put it ...?

On Monday morning I arrived at work straight from the airport and my Mum called me that my Father's Father died on Monday morning April 23rd at 10 a.m. It came all of a sudden to me but they knew from Thursday that he was admitted to hospital with some kind of heartstroke but they prevented me from knowing as I was about to leave for a weekend holiday to the Netherlands. Meanwhile I light-heartedly enjoyed the Flatland, he was almost unconsious and dying slowly.

He left us piecefully, almost no pain. No one recognised that he had a 6-cm tumor in the head - the doctors found it out on Wednesay last week. But he was falling slowly into his inner word and there was no chance that he would be submitted to any kind of oncological treatment ... 

On Monday morning he had no strenght to go on and stepped to the other world. My 2 Grandfathers are in heaven - one of them is digging in the heavenly garden and the other one is doing some woodcarving.

REST IN PEACE!

Story of a 3rd Grandfather

Once upon a time I dated this guy from a small town in north Moravia. To cut long story short ... we broke up. We have not been in touch since that dramatic occasion and I don't mind but what persisted to this day are the knots that I tied. At least once a month we would go to the grandparents' place to chat, to dine, to simply have a word with elderly people, who were happy to see us. They were great people and I liked them more then his parents (an alcoholic Father and a neurotic first-grade teacher Mother).
After the split I had no objective reason to go see the grandparents. However, I thought that I should not cut the links I built and I still might want to visit them. Christmas was the right occasion and it happend so that the tradition has been set - every Christmas since 2002 me and my parents (yes, I involved them too!) visit my "3rd grandparents". Nothing fancy - we usually spend there an hour or so, little of a chit-chat. Granny is a tiny woman with a broad heart, she wants to please you with food and company and Grandaddy was a wise old man. They were recently saddened as their only son passed away 2 yeasr ago. Well, it is sad but if we consider his exuberant alcoholic life, one can just wonder how it is possible he lived for so long.
On March 15th I arrived home and an envelope with black stripe awaited me in my mail box. I immediately knew what and I knew who ...
My "third" Grandfather died and Granny remained all alone in their house. Her 2 grandchildren are occupied with their own problems and their own new-born kids, they even do not live in the same town. When I call her, she does not complain as such but I cannot miss the sadness in her voice saying "I am here all alone". All her adult life she was with her husband, they have been together for 60 years! And now he is gone. Gone forever. She remained here, stuck with a big house and solitude and no one who would express some sympathy. No one appreciates her kindness and long-life unselfishness. The kids come to say hi seldom and then just solitude remains again. When you are old, people tend to care less. Why? Old means useless? No! Please, do care for people, when they remain alone - they need it. It does not matter they are old - they still need us!

Butterflies in my stomach

My first post of 2012! This yeas has had rather swift start for me. After some thoughts we (me + my BF) bought plane tickets to our first long-distance holiday destination to Indonesia - to Bali Island. It cost a fortune but what is done cannot be undone so there is no other way but really to go there! :-)

I could not have concentrated on planning of this Bali trip because I had other holiday ahead - annual skiing expedition to Kitzbühel, which turned out great. There were 6 of us, usual crew and we had a lot of fun (and food and beer). There was enough snow though weather wasn't that great. Once I have returned from the trip, I was able to concentrate on my next trip. One task after the other. My multitasking ability was a total failure here:-) There are 8 days left and my head is spinning with what to-do-lists, shopping-lists, what-else-to-do-lists. Damn! :-) Lets see how the holiday turns out - I had a 3-year break so I totally deserve it. Two days ago I was reading a blog of a friend of mine and got totally crazy about how cool this holiday will be! I got so enthusiastic! Lets roll!